Monday, June 6, 2011

the little monkey: my dear daughter!!

Today, I feel very motherly. I have this urge to be with her all the time, sometimes.
She looks so innocent and sweet...right? There is a little monkey inside that tiny body of hers', waiting for release.
She is on the go from the moment she opens her eyes, to the moment exhaustion finally gets to her.She is my life and I guess nothing or anyone can take her place.
But that is the same for every parent, for the kid to be all...so much so, that we forget to take care of ourselves, to forget about the need for a pedicure( I would love one but am usually too exhausted to go looking in Hanoi for a clean place),the need to cut my hair and to color - my hair has now officially more greys than blacks, the want of new clothes and also a nice massage. There, that is my wish list.
Pretty simple, right.
Wrong.

Whenever I have the slightest free time, I prefer to relax at home and also to sleep rather than go looking around this god forsaken city for a good but cheap place which would do all this for me. Also, if SW is around, I cannot seem to leave her side. There seems to be a inner me which does not tend to follow my outer self, which screams at me every time I look in the mirror - get a makeover.
I am a fashion designer, I am supposed to look great, follow fashion and be dressed to the nines. Unfortunately, I can give all the advice and all the knowledge, but if it comes to personally being an inspiration to my students, I fail miserably. I have morning breakfast stains, I have grey hair which desperately needs care and attention, I have not waxed in 2 weeks now and need one badly...I need a pedi and mani as well...Urgently.
I am just tired. Somehow.
Is there a way one can do all the chores, do their job, take care of the kid and still be dressed to kill... I think people can manage that...why cant I??

And I cannot blame SW for it all... She is a dear and who would not want to spend all their time with her...
Even when I get time even when she is in school, I do not go.What is this new weird thing to be unkept all the time??Is it Hanoi? This place is so dirty and polluted all the time and I guess I figure...What is the point?
Also, we are in this major budget and saving mode all the time..since we have never saved up before...We are now on super save mode...trying to save every bit we can...So that we can travel and also for emergencies. So now, even when we have money, I feel compelled to save it up. Have I become miserly??I used to be a person who would blow up everything by the 20th of every month and then wait out the remaining few days for the next salary...Now whether it is because of people around me, whether its for my daughter, or whether its just me...I have not a clue. But I sure know this....My life has changed!!! Drastically!!! And I would give an arm and a leg to have what I had in my college days - a great bod, A devil may care attitude, great sex life and a well groomed ,well coifed head of hair...
And I started this post for SW. Shit!! Well, I guess, another time and place...

PS: the pic can stay though...cute, isn't she?!!!!!!

Friday, June 3, 2011

lucid dreams part 2



For those who are into lucid dreams: here are some plants which can help you...read NOT dope or DMT....

there is a herb in dear old Me - he - co(Mexico) which the tribes use to achieve the most beautiful lucid dreams possible..or so they say!

Calea zacatechichi...so the dream herb, as it is called is used by the tribes to lucid dream. these are the plants which have effect only when you are asleep.

There are several other plants used in Indian communities of Mexico to obtain divinatory messages from dreams. Several puffball mushrooms (Lycoperdon spp.) wrongly reported as hallucinogens are eaten fresh by Mixtec Indians before going to bed in order to dream. Nahuatl Indians use an as yet unidentified species of Salvia, known by the name of Xiouit, for the same purpose. The Tarahumara Indians use a plant called "Bacana", which has been reported to be used as a divinatory agent, was later confirmed as an herb to help induce dreaming.

there are some plants in Africa as well, which are used by shamans in their rituals to induce a dream state.

So the thought process here : All the hocus pocus that you thought was usually associated with the rituals in Voodoo and other shaman religions have a base...And its interesting that normal people like us also experience this - of course without any plant induced haze...Though, I would love to try it out...No turning back on experiencing new things, right!!!??

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

The elusive lucid state...

I was just doing some research on, well, nothing...I sit and look up things on youtube when free because you stumble upon some amazing things. And today I did. Today's find: I came across this Dutch guy who is an electronics music composer and he has put his music online...btw, he does not have a CD or is he well known...But his work...I cannot begin to tell you how talented he is...and I was researching on dreams...I remember now.
My point????

Let me start over.
I started my research with lucid dreams... I love having them, obviously. They totally give you an experience to remember and when I wake, I feel like I have done something...had a great time, usually. I sometimes get my creative ideas from my dreams. So, coming back to youtube: When free, I go to National geographic or Discovery to see what they have in store for me. Today morning, as I had a wonderful lucid dream which I unfortunately remember nothing of, except the fact that it was wonderful, prompted me to do some research on the subject.


This is what I came up with: we can train our minds to have lucid dreams every night and they have helped people come up with creative inputs, solve problems and also to have a great time. As some guy put it, this is just a state of mind where the brain is unfettered by logic, leaving it to roam free and experience things like flying, dreamscapes etc...
The best part - the biggest inventors of the world - Einstein, Dali - all admitted to having dreamt up the solutions and ideas. Even today, NASA scientists get their ideas from lucid dreaming.

Would it not be wonderful if we could do all our thinking in the lucid dream state, wake up and then just start working. it will such a lovely utilization of time and imagine the ideas one can get. Dreams have always gotten crazy for me and I have had dreams from me being a spy to the proverbial flying experience...All I can tell you is that when you wake up, you actually feel like you did it and so disappointed that you are awake now.
What a lovely idea for a game, isn't it?We have X-box today and 3D games, but imagine a lucid dream box....takes you where you want to go and what you want ot do...all while sleeping. And my thought is not so far behind...the scientists have already developed a sleeping eye patch called the dreamer which helps a person have lucid dreams. You can teach yourself to recognise that you are in fact dreaming and all this is not real. after that is done...you can steer the dream into any direction you want.

AMAZING ...is it not?!!!!

Dying to sleep?Tell your brain to lucid dream...apparently the command helps as well..
Have fun!